Tips to find Focus and use its Power!

Wanna know one the most interesting thing about our children and ourselves now a-days?

We all have problems with focus.

We think we’ve got it down. That we can focus when we “put our mind to it.” But in truth, we’re continually flipping from one thing to another, and that’s where life gets incredibly scattered.

I like to compare it to tabs on an internet browser. We all do it. We all have our email tab open at the same time as our social media. We all come up with some idea of something to check up, so we surf a bit for a solution, at the same time waiting for a notification. We are a generation of distraction and we’re passing that on to our children.

Our children are scattered and then they are getting into trouble for not focusing.

So, what is focus, really? Is it simply the ability to put attention on something for a specific period of time? Is it the concentration on a project or the ability to stick to one job until it’s completed?

Currently, I have children doing schoolwork downstairs, I have some laundry that needs to be done, I just cleaned up the kitchen, but was thinking about this post while I was doing it... I’ve promised a son I’m taking him to the park in 20 minutes and I’m awaiting responses to some emails.

It feels a little pushed and pulled in my opinion.

Also, I just had to shift gears on a webinar I was planning and change it to a course, so somewhere in my subconscious I’m designing that, so all in all, I could be really stressed and scattered if I wasn’t aware of it.

I believe focus is more than just about zero-ing in on one thing at a time.

Focus is about intention... and intention is about aligned energy.

It’s the wish-washyness of indecisiveness that creates chaos. Once we line up to some intention, everything seems to flow within that direction.

Often guilt, or the super-mommy complex gets in the way and within that one poisonous thought of “when I focus on that, surely my children will just be aimless...” that we run around trying to “set them up”, before taking care of our own energy direction.

But then, you ask, how do we choose the direction if we’re so scattered we don’t know how to form priorities.

First step... meditate.

It doesn’t need to be a long sit down meditation. Rather its the simple concept of gathering your thoughts and energy to form a focused stream. Imagine your thoughts... each creating energy.. and you simply focus on the energy for a moment... letting it gather in front of you.

Create that ball of light and love in front of you, reminding yourself that there is nothing more important to that to radiate as yourself before you do anything else.

By that focus of feeling grounded in Who You Really Are... you then allow inspiration and other universal powers to help you lay out your intentions.

So... first breathe. Breathe in for the count of 5... hold for the count of 5... and exhale for the count of 5.

Repeat 5 times.

Now, you might find you’ve forgotten what was so scattered and the day feels clearer.

Next... very pragmatically, I usually write a brief list.

No specific order... just what would feel nice to have accomplished in the day... and then I put it in an easy order to let it flow through.

But... let’s face it... we have children and sometimes plans are made to be broken. Sometimes, sandtables need to be played with, or we need to jump on a trampoline.. sometimes we need to break all order to have some fun.

Next remind yourself that that’s where life shows up... in between plans.

and in that aligned energy of your day... allow things to show up. When you've started with meditation, than you can sense the energy of what's flowing in. You can line up to taking a break from your list. You can show up with your children at the park, rather than letting the back thoughts in of "I should be doing something else..." So lining up to the moment is also a trick of focus.

I’m working on own focus, really. I’m working on my social media consumption and how to schedule it rather than be absorbed by it. When we were travelling on the road I had no access (I won’t allow myself a smart phone), and I know I became more present. But I also felt out of touch with my clients and work, which didn’t suit me at all. So, I’m researching and feeling my way.

Because I don’t like my thoughts to be tabs in my own brain’s server. Rather, I want them to be directed streams of energy... full of joy and emotion and feeling... full of power which can be picked up on from the universal source that can bring in more of the same.

Life is exciting when we allow it to be and a scattered brain, leads to nothing. It’s full of deadends and the attraction point is simply chaos.

Vibrational Focus!

Want a focus exercise?
 Find an overall vibrational focus... an image of something that feels wonderful. Be it the feeling of being on a family bike ride, or being by the beach... something that resonates with freedom and order and fun and laughter. Something that resonates with your dream day.

Rest your tongue against your teeth, at the bottom of your mouth and simply allow the feeling of the thought flow over you. Stay there for a few moments.

When you are doing this short exercise, you are actually training your focus to reach a vibrational goal. You are feeling something strongly and holding it.. allowing it to build and show up in your day.

If we can teach ourselves to do this first thing in the morning we are simply making a suggestion to the universal source about what we want to feel more of... and then we can let the day flow in accordingly.

So, I’d like to hear what your favorite feeling space is? What’s an image that calls it up?

And if you focus on it... does your day flow in with that same feeling? Easily unfolding in joy?

And if you want to pop over to the FB Group or Page to share your intentions and focuses... it’s a great way to explore how they feel and to share with others.

Because together, we can help create a stronger focus and radiate Who We Really Are.

A Lesson in Energy for Quick Relief

One of the tools I find the most helpful in finding quick connection I found through learning Energy healing a few years ago. In fact, my daughters took the course with me as well, and I’ve witnessed how they interweave the teachings through their lives. The idea of grounding themselves, or observing their own energy blocks has been an incredible tool for self awareness.

But, I digress. The information and practice of increasing flow of energy is something I often pass on to clients and they’ve often mentioned how much it has helped them through their days.

So, I wanted to share it with all of you today.

We are energy beings. If you’ve heard of chakras then you know we have energy points through our bodies which, when aligned and with a clear path keep us as perfect conduits between the earth and spirit. We are spiritual, physical and emotional expressed through energy.

Its often taught that we can align our energy from our core root chakra, near the base of our spine and then focus upwards, clearing each chakra or energy point along the way.

However, I usually offer this...

As a society we spend so much time in our heads. Over the past 15 years we have become about information over physical expression. As the saying goes, “where attention goes, energy flows...”

So, in that case, our energy is stored in our heads, resulting in overstress, headaches, brain chatter and over thinking.

You know that snowballing feeling, when things build and build, thought upon thought? It starts with a little seed of something and then suddenly you feel like the world is falling upon your shoulders. Well, its a clear sign that energy needs to flow elsewhere.

But the ironic part of that is when you are in your thoughts you resist not thinking, or focusing on something else. Rather, the snowball continues, asking you to figure out “what should I think about to stop all this thinking?”

And I reply.... “focus on your feet.”

Sounds silly, I know. But, by shifting your attention to your feet, wiggling your toes, circling your ankles, soaking them in a tub or simply thinking about the feeling of the floor beneath them, you are drawing attention away from your head and allowing your energy to move down to the earth... through your central core. You are officially grounding yourself.

Imagine how this feels when you are running around, stressed out, juggling schedules lunches, phone calls and children’s shouts for help.

Breathe, relax, FEET. Sigh.

It really does work.

For those who have worked with me or been on my page for awhile, you might have heard me talk about the elevator meditation, which is a technique to bring your attention down to your ground level. To watch a video showing how to use it over at my channel.

The simple process of guiding your consciousness from your top floor, floor ten, around your head, and counting backwards, imagining an inner elevator shaft through your centre, helps you become aware of where your energy is.

You can feel your attention shift to floor 6 around your heart.

And then move down to 4 around your navel.

But then you get distracted and you think about something you have to do... back to floor 10.

Finally you find your moment in the present. Floor 1. Ground floor. Relax.

The more you practice this short meditation, the easier you find where you are on your core shaft , the more you sense your essence and how grounded you are. You can literally find what floor you are at within moments.

As energy beings we create through focus. Things go well when we are aligned with Who We Really Are and when we are grounded in the present moment, so the first key to being true to ourselves and being a spiritually aware parent is to find that inner sense of energy, and help it flow.

I love passing these sort of quick centering techniques onto clients.

 If you haven’t yet, please visit my website for more information and quick techniques to feeling better!

Road trip lessons on being true to yourself

My family and I hit the road in our Dodge Caravan just before Christmas. We’d been promising our children and ourselves some travel and adventure, and it fell into the perfect time. It was one of those “go for it” moments, and luckily, as people who work online, we were able to jump at it.

What I love about traveling is how we are all together, in close proximity. Really close. Even our dog from his crate is readily involved.

2015 was a busy year. Between coaching, launching e-coaching packages and new groups, planning workshops and webinars and not counting home schooling, renovating and parenting new born kittens, it seemed like life was running full steam ahead. But, when we get into the car for a roadtrip, my whole family seems to land full on, in the moment. We sit, we talk, we sing, we think and ponder. It’s just meandering and I think it allows all of us to grow and get to know ourselves better.

Ironically, on this road trip, we’ve been sporadically staying with family and that adds such a different element to getting to know oneself. It sometimes feels like its seeing ourselves in a periscope... and I don’t mean the app.

Last summer, my husband and I both experimented with offering our work through video. We practiced being in front of the camera, and observed how we got new self awareness by simply watching ourselves. I got to know my facial expressions, my nervous ticks, but also my signs of feeling comfortable and how I sounded when I was confident in my favorite topics.

But when we stay with family whom we haven’t seen since we were younger, and then they meet our children, whom they barely know (but who look remarkably like we did when we were younger) then a few things get observed... and it can throw an interesting turn.

You know that feeling, the old school reunion feeling, when you wonder why the moment you see people who used to know you, you start acting in the same way that you used to. Suddenly, you act like the school clown, or the stylish fashionista. Suddenly, people are making assumptions and comments based on their old ideas of who you presented yourself to be. What’s funny, is that usually, when we were younger, we rarely presenting ourselves as who we really were!

Well, being with family is similar. Old habits, thought processes and reactions get stirred up. People expect you to present yourself as something you haven’t been in years, and somewhere in that, you rise to the expectation, and only show them that side they expect.

SO, first reaction, is to fight against it. We crave to show the new and improved version, we hunt out moments to show up as ourselves and to state new perspectives. But, because we’re trying too hard, it usually lands with a flop. The look crosses over a relatives’ faces... “there she goes again. She always was dramatic.” You hear their thoughts say.

But, we crave understanding right? We want to yell it from the rooftops... “Stop and get to know the real me!”... but, the more we push, the less authentic we feel. Push and pulling, we disconnect from the very core being of ourselves we’re so eager for everyone to meet.

So, in the long run, it’s finally a question of giving up. With a little meditation, a lot of breathing, and some skyward glances, we simply let everyone thing what they want, what they believe.

It’s more important to be happy than right anyway.

And yet, in that split second of release, that very moment when we decide to not care what people think and just be ourselves, we stop pushing against it, and allow ourselves to show up again, in all glory. We feel like ourselves again and, when we forget to notice, it radiates out from us. We are one again, in who we really are.

And through those eyes, we realize something. In all our concerns and self consciousness, those people who’s mind we were trying to change... were doing the same thing with us all along and we were doing the same to them.

Yes, I admit it. I sometimes remember people’s past when being in their present. I sometimes think of them as who they were, without allowing their new selves to shine through.

We are all on a journey of expansive growth. We live, learn, grow, explore and expand. Versions of ourselves come and go with new perspectives and it is a glorious ride. It’s not about proving where we are on the ride to anyone... there’s not a measuring stick or scale that we’re being held against. We know who we are, when we allow our thoughts to become quiet enough to hear it and when we allow it to flow from us, than we radiate it out for all the world to feel.

We have to trust our own journey, and know that other’s are on their own.

Their own journey... from a parent’s perspective that also means our children’s journey as well.

There’s the third step in all of this, the next generation. I can look at my daughters and assume they like the same thing they did two year ago, I can assume my son wants me to put him to sleep, rather than allow him that choice. We can keep anyone, including our children, imprisoned in the concepts we hold for them, based on the past or our perspective.

Or we can free ourselves of any concept of another, allowing them to show up as themselves this moment... and giving ourselves permission to do the same.