Well, the wrapping paper has been thrown away, the chocolates are mostly gone, and a few little pieces to this toy or that has gone to the place they do and never return, no matter how hard you look. Over all, it was a nice Christmas. After weeks of nerves and stress from our two darling girls, Christmas came and went, and they slept well Christmas night, knowing it was a 365 day wait until the next. But they were also prepared for the fact that the best was yet to come.
Boxing Day and Christmas week, what a lovely thing. We sit around in pjs, eating left over treats, watching movies and squeezing out loads of family time. We pull out board games and let the girls stay up way later than usual and then we sigh, why don’t we do more of this usually? Yes this is the week that stress is gone and it feels Off to do any work, we just look for things to enjoy and then do them some more. At the same time the children have new things that they are thrilled with and are happy to play, play, play all day without looking for more. Sigh, lovely.
However, around this time my thoughts always shift to the New Year ahead and the old year that’s gone. Where have I come to, what have I done, What will I do, and how do I enter through the gateway of 2011? What will be the energy of the new year, what will it feel like and how do I want to feel in it?
New year resolutions are interesting things. They seem to represent the hidden desires of us all, what we really want, but then are given the stress of struggle and the idea of obstacles that need to be surmounted.
“Here’s a thing I really, really, really want,” we tell ourselves, “and its going to be so, so ,so hard to accomplish, but I will put myself to the test and beat this thing! I never keep new year’s resolutions, but this year I will, gosh darn it!”
What an energy to put ourselves in for a brand new start. Meanwhile, resolutions are usually forgotten by mid-January so then we feel guilty at being weak. Ah, lovely.
But if we could just stay at the point of that hidden desire from which our resolutions are born. The one that says, here, this is where I want to be, I want to be thinner and imagine how my life would be if it was so. Or I want to be successful, imagine my life if it was so. Or I want to be a better parent, imagine my life if it was so.
And then STOP before you get into the not so happy place of “So if I want that I have to do this, and this and this… and I have to hurry before swim suit season is here…etc, before my kids are grown up and my chance is blown, I have to work really hard at this…” Well you know the drill.
Yes, I’ve been looking a lot at the coming year and trying it on as if a piece of clothing. Has where I’ve come from this year past, fit me well? Or shall I make some alterations? Has it created the future year to have my desires, my passions and my soul purposes fulfilled, or am I way off track and the new year doesn’t fit me at all?
And what about parenting? Where does it fall into this rant on New Year ideas? Tonight I sat looking at my sleeping son and imagined years down the road. When he is grown will his mom-eries fit me well? Will what him and his sisters take from this childhood of theirs match the energy I dream at night of? Is the home we’re creating, the feeling of the home I’ve always wished to create for them?
New Year resolutions for me don’t have to be stressful regimes and guilt filled denial of things. Rather I choose to take some time to take stock of my vibration and where it is taking me. Also, what is the vibration of what I want the new year to bring? What is my vibration as a parent? Do I get stressed too much, anxious, bored? Do I look to my children as excuses to not feel good, or do I use them as the vibration raisers they are, a distraction from anything that bothers me and a reason to grab hold of the moment and play my heart out? I know for a fact, that the more I take pleasure in enjoying my moments with them, the better parent I will be. I know that the more I relax and let the wellbeing flow, the more my vibration will blend with everything I am.
Therefore, I will spend sometime in my thoughts, creating the feeling of the kind of parent I wish to be. I will imagine the feeling of our children running to me with their questions or problems, I will feel the freedom of laughing and playing with them, I will imagine the ease of helping them learn and grow, and the satisfaction of passing on tools to them to help them in their future, without strain or stress, just organically out of life.
But, what if thin/slim is your vision for the new year? What if success, wealth and abundance is what you have tagged 2011 for? Try them on for size, literally. Imagine how it feels, does it feel like you? Can you imagine the energy of what that feels like? Than that’s all the resolution you have to have. To imagine, to enjoy, to relish and to trust in its coming when it is truly a well tailored fit.
The work, work, work thing, only gets what you think you can achieve, maybe. By imagining the vibration of what you want, by savouring the moments you capture it in thought, by enjoying the little moments of time of pure pleasure, opens up the doorways to have things beyond your imagination to flow your way.
For New Years, my husband is releasing his single I Will Consciously Create My Day. Personally, I think there is no better way to start the new year than with that simple statement. Focus on the good things, create a lovely day for yourself and with that a lifetime of good days will follow.
Happy New Year everyone, and may the vibrations that flow over you, through you and with you be a perfect match to everything you really are, without struggle, hardship or a drop of unhappiness.
I will Consciously Create My Day by Jeff Fletcher is available thru itunes worldwide. Check out www.jefffletcher.ca for more information.
Thursday, December 30, 2010
Friday, December 17, 2010
Re-focusing from Christmas stress to Christmas Joy
It’s a busy time of year. At our house, December is wrapping up month, not just presents and parcels, but a time to finish up projects and reflect on what the year has been.
Christmas has been socially accepted as a time of joy. People try to smile more, enjoy the company of family and friends more, savour the little things in life, enjoy the feeling of giving, let go of the small stuff, and basically slow their days down to focus on the moments of life.
For most people, Christmas week takes on a different energy, as if all life stops and re-focuses on what’s important. We then enter the new year with some concept of bringing that energy into the everyday, but forget it by January 15th.
There is something lovely about setting an actual time out from life on a global scale. A time where its assumed you’ll be enjoying yourself or at least spending time on the little joys in life that make you feel better.
But then, somewhere we lost focus and decided to introduce stress to the holiday. As if we were so addicted to it in our everyday, that we couldn’t imagine life without it. Unfortunately, I don’t think this affects anyone greater than our children. You know the ones we parents try to make the holidays “magical” for.
Since becoming a parent, there’s been part of me that dreads the winter holidays. When the girls were small I kept them out of any store for the entire month of November, trying to postpone them thinking about it. Now I notice that as of mid Nov. they get more frustrated with things, whine a little bit more and anxious as they scan toy shelves and make requests, they get so worked up about Christmas morning that when it comes its almost a let down and then its over. Meanwhile rather than letting the feeling of joyful moments, appreciation and love flow over me, my thoughts shift to getting what they want, if they like what I got them or whether I’ll pull of baking this year and when.
How screwed up, when you consider how the universe works.
I asked my children about it today. I first asked them what they liked about the holidays and what they felt about it. They both described the Christmas morning scene, and said it was the sense of mystery, the surprise and excitement that they looked forward to. I then asked them if it made any sense that the people generally get stressed out about “creating” that Christmas feeling, but are really anxious, worried, even threatening their children with the lie of “Santa won’t come” as a way to get them out of their hair.
I was so proud of our darlings when they said, that it made no sense, as a happy time can not really be made by being frustrated, upset or mad. You can pretend your way into it, but not really settle into that blissful state of being, called joy.
Law of Attraction out of the mouths of a 7-8 year old.
Most people are horrified when I tell them we didn’t try to convince our children about Santa Claus. We told them straight off, it was all a story. We get told how nice it is for children to believe in magic, but what they forget is one day the child finds out their parents lied, there is no Santa and magic goes out the window along with trust.
Life is magic. Everyday is magic and every day was meant to be enjoyed, savoured and shared. It might be sad that some need a holiday to jumpstart them into it, but so be it, if it works. Its not as sad as the fact we’ve switched that holiday into being about stress and anxiety over a silly thing like toys.
December 21st is Winter Solstice and we’ve made it a tradition to celebrate it with decorating a tree in our woods with family and friends. We make it about magic, about life and about the wonder of a dead, cold winter, producing new life for the spring to come.
Isn’t that magic? That every tree has gone into dormancy but has the life giving force to bloom again? Why make up a man in a red suit who gives what your children want, and stress yourself out in trying to provide it, when we all have that force within and around us to provide whatever we all ever wanted, Simply by focusing on the little joys, the pleasant smells, the sweet faces and the Christmas magic that flows this time of year.
This was a rambling post, but it’s a rambling time of year. I suppose as a conclusion I would say that if you are stressed, if your children are pulling their hair out for Christmas to come, if life is at its max and asking for more, than take a breather. Have some cocoa, stop and smell your Christmas tree, warm your toes by a fire, or have way too many Christmas cookies. Relax, enjoy and savour this time of Magic, and remind yourself that you don’t need to struggle or stress, everything is perfect in its own way, life has a way of working out if you let go, and within you is the life force magic giving power to create new leaves on a tree that seems dead, you just have to trust, relax and take the pleasures in.
Christmas has been socially accepted as a time of joy. People try to smile more, enjoy the company of family and friends more, savour the little things in life, enjoy the feeling of giving, let go of the small stuff, and basically slow their days down to focus on the moments of life.
For most people, Christmas week takes on a different energy, as if all life stops and re-focuses on what’s important. We then enter the new year with some concept of bringing that energy into the everyday, but forget it by January 15th.
There is something lovely about setting an actual time out from life on a global scale. A time where its assumed you’ll be enjoying yourself or at least spending time on the little joys in life that make you feel better.
But then, somewhere we lost focus and decided to introduce stress to the holiday. As if we were so addicted to it in our everyday, that we couldn’t imagine life without it. Unfortunately, I don’t think this affects anyone greater than our children. You know the ones we parents try to make the holidays “magical” for.
Since becoming a parent, there’s been part of me that dreads the winter holidays. When the girls were small I kept them out of any store for the entire month of November, trying to postpone them thinking about it. Now I notice that as of mid Nov. they get more frustrated with things, whine a little bit more and anxious as they scan toy shelves and make requests, they get so worked up about Christmas morning that when it comes its almost a let down and then its over. Meanwhile rather than letting the feeling of joyful moments, appreciation and love flow over me, my thoughts shift to getting what they want, if they like what I got them or whether I’ll pull of baking this year and when.
How screwed up, when you consider how the universe works.
I asked my children about it today. I first asked them what they liked about the holidays and what they felt about it. They both described the Christmas morning scene, and said it was the sense of mystery, the surprise and excitement that they looked forward to. I then asked them if it made any sense that the people generally get stressed out about “creating” that Christmas feeling, but are really anxious, worried, even threatening their children with the lie of “Santa won’t come” as a way to get them out of their hair.
I was so proud of our darlings when they said, that it made no sense, as a happy time can not really be made by being frustrated, upset or mad. You can pretend your way into it, but not really settle into that blissful state of being, called joy.
Law of Attraction out of the mouths of a 7-8 year old.
Most people are horrified when I tell them we didn’t try to convince our children about Santa Claus. We told them straight off, it was all a story. We get told how nice it is for children to believe in magic, but what they forget is one day the child finds out their parents lied, there is no Santa and magic goes out the window along with trust.
Life is magic. Everyday is magic and every day was meant to be enjoyed, savoured and shared. It might be sad that some need a holiday to jumpstart them into it, but so be it, if it works. Its not as sad as the fact we’ve switched that holiday into being about stress and anxiety over a silly thing like toys.
December 21st is Winter Solstice and we’ve made it a tradition to celebrate it with decorating a tree in our woods with family and friends. We make it about magic, about life and about the wonder of a dead, cold winter, producing new life for the spring to come.
Isn’t that magic? That every tree has gone into dormancy but has the life giving force to bloom again? Why make up a man in a red suit who gives what your children want, and stress yourself out in trying to provide it, when we all have that force within and around us to provide whatever we all ever wanted, Simply by focusing on the little joys, the pleasant smells, the sweet faces and the Christmas magic that flows this time of year.
This was a rambling post, but it’s a rambling time of year. I suppose as a conclusion I would say that if you are stressed, if your children are pulling their hair out for Christmas to come, if life is at its max and asking for more, than take a breather. Have some cocoa, stop and smell your Christmas tree, warm your toes by a fire, or have way too many Christmas cookies. Relax, enjoy and savour this time of Magic, and remind yourself that you don’t need to struggle or stress, everything is perfect in its own way, life has a way of working out if you let go, and within you is the life force magic giving power to create new leaves on a tree that seems dead, you just have to trust, relax and take the pleasures in.
Thursday, December 2, 2010
the Law of Attraction when life is chaotic
It’s always good when your philosophy gets put to the test and ends up working miracles.
We’ve had a really busy month. My husband, who’s a singer/songwriter, has been releasing a few singles and we’ve been doing all sorts of things to get it out there. Whereas we usually keep our work until night, we’ve been forced to do some in the day, which for our children, has been a nightmare. On top of that Christmas is at the forefront of our daughters’ minds, and quite frankly, it’s creating havoc. Therefore, they ran about, bouncing from one end of the room to another, dropping things where they stood, making a total disaster of their room, and giving their brother a run for his money. Even when our 18 month boy had his nap, chaos seemed to be the order of the day and no matter how much their father and I begged for some calm, focused activity, it just wasn’t in their grasp at that moment.
That night, as hysterical, high-strung voices were the lullaby I put our boy to sleep with, I decided it was time to do something about our daughters’ peace of mind. I could rant and rave, demanding quiet, demanding order, and getting frustrated and mad about their inability to find calm, or I could rely on what I know, find my own peace of mind.
As I lulled our boy to sleep, I found that blissful place of inner calm. I reached in within and found a sense of wellbeing, despite the craziness that was going on downstairs. Suddenly I knew how to deal with it and once the littlest was asleep, I went downstairs, calm, cool and collected.
Our daughters were desperately looking for an episode of Little House on The Prairie on Youtube to continue the new family habit of us 4 sitting together to watch one, but they were getting frustrated, couldn’t find one that was a little cheerful, and everything was going wrong for them. I sat on the couch and said,
“I don’t think we’re going to be able to watch one tonight. You won’t be able to find one, because its not the right vibration. We watch these, to be together as a family, to act like the close, supportive group we are. But because we aren’t acting like that in the day, it’s impossible to attract it at night.”
They thought about it, and since they know about the Law of Attraction and about how we get what we send out, they had to agree.
“We’re not mad.” I continued “because right now things are stressful, and you just haven’t learnt how to deal with it. So we’re going to help you. Tomorrow, you’ll wake up to new schoolwork plans, some chores and some other structured things we need you to do to help us out. When you do them, we will be acting more like how we want the house to feel, Dad and I will have less work to do, and then things will go better when we sit down at night.”
They went to bed slightly tentative but eager by the idea of some structure and the next morning they jumped to their list. They had all their stuff done before our work in the day was finished, and I was slightly worried hysteria would break out again, but in fact they were so use to being helpful and responsible they quickly jumped into new ideas of what to do and were the pure joys they naturally are. We didn’t try to push against their eagerness of Christmas, rather we watched them come up with ideas, crafts and games to build upon everything.
That night, we sat together as a family, and ended up watching a movie we’d been looking for since February. Rather than an hour we had a 2 hour family time and it was lovely.
I guess, The Law of Attraction does it again.
Now excuse me… I have some planning to do for tomorrow
We’ve had a really busy month. My husband, who’s a singer/songwriter, has been releasing a few singles and we’ve been doing all sorts of things to get it out there. Whereas we usually keep our work until night, we’ve been forced to do some in the day, which for our children, has been a nightmare. On top of that Christmas is at the forefront of our daughters’ minds, and quite frankly, it’s creating havoc. Therefore, they ran about, bouncing from one end of the room to another, dropping things where they stood, making a total disaster of their room, and giving their brother a run for his money. Even when our 18 month boy had his nap, chaos seemed to be the order of the day and no matter how much their father and I begged for some calm, focused activity, it just wasn’t in their grasp at that moment.
That night, as hysterical, high-strung voices were the lullaby I put our boy to sleep with, I decided it was time to do something about our daughters’ peace of mind. I could rant and rave, demanding quiet, demanding order, and getting frustrated and mad about their inability to find calm, or I could rely on what I know, find my own peace of mind.
As I lulled our boy to sleep, I found that blissful place of inner calm. I reached in within and found a sense of wellbeing, despite the craziness that was going on downstairs. Suddenly I knew how to deal with it and once the littlest was asleep, I went downstairs, calm, cool and collected.
Our daughters were desperately looking for an episode of Little House on The Prairie on Youtube to continue the new family habit of us 4 sitting together to watch one, but they were getting frustrated, couldn’t find one that was a little cheerful, and everything was going wrong for them. I sat on the couch and said,
“I don’t think we’re going to be able to watch one tonight. You won’t be able to find one, because its not the right vibration. We watch these, to be together as a family, to act like the close, supportive group we are. But because we aren’t acting like that in the day, it’s impossible to attract it at night.”
They thought about it, and since they know about the Law of Attraction and about how we get what we send out, they had to agree.
“We’re not mad.” I continued “because right now things are stressful, and you just haven’t learnt how to deal with it. So we’re going to help you. Tomorrow, you’ll wake up to new schoolwork plans, some chores and some other structured things we need you to do to help us out. When you do them, we will be acting more like how we want the house to feel, Dad and I will have less work to do, and then things will go better when we sit down at night.”
They went to bed slightly tentative but eager by the idea of some structure and the next morning they jumped to their list. They had all their stuff done before our work in the day was finished, and I was slightly worried hysteria would break out again, but in fact they were so use to being helpful and responsible they quickly jumped into new ideas of what to do and were the pure joys they naturally are. We didn’t try to push against their eagerness of Christmas, rather we watched them come up with ideas, crafts and games to build upon everything.
That night, we sat together as a family, and ended up watching a movie we’d been looking for since February. Rather than an hour we had a 2 hour family time and it was lovely.
I guess, The Law of Attraction does it again.
Now excuse me… I have some planning to do for tomorrow
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)